So gross.

Beauty pageant veteran Alana Thompson (aka "Honey Boo Boo Child") with her mother June
Beauty pageant veteran Alana Thompson (aka “Honey Boo Boo Child”) with her mother June

Geico’s latest ad campaign, a welcome relief from the Aussie gecko, is about people who economize in strange ways. Says an ordinary Joe in one, “Weight loss programs can be expensive, so to save some money, I just got the popular girls from the local middle school to follow me around.” Then we see him foraging in his refrigerator for a midnight snack. He chooses a lopsided sandwich. Cut to three middle school girls standing in the shadows. “Ew,” says one, oozing insouciance. “Seriously?” says another. “So gross,” says the last.

This scene repeats at the waffle place, then at the burger joint. Ew. Seriously? So gross.

Aversion therapy.


This morning in a moment of weakness, I watched a promo for TLC’s hot (so I gather) new property, “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo.” I’d skittered out from under my rock for just long enough to catch the scent of it. That name. Honey Boo Boo, for godsakes. And the photos of the chubby toddler made up to look like an 80s pop star.

You know the guy who slows down to see if any body parts are visible near the flipped over car? In the case of Honey Boo Boo, I was — I am — that guy.

So picture this: Those middle school girls from the Geico ad standing in the war room as TLC’s programming executives make a decision on any given day.

“Ew,” says one. “Seriously?” says another. “So gross,” says the last.